PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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