it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
