I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
4 words: hood of his car
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
