if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
