All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
