That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
