All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Randomize
