You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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