you guys were way drunker than both of me
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
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I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
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Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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