loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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