I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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