I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
