I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
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