Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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