Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
