I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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