i just made my gag reflex go away.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
