OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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