Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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