No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize