I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
