I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
