so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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