I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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