we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize