first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize