I met the friendliest cop last night
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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