me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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