I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
My orgasm happened in two different decades
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
