covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize