Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
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I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
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I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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