I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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