I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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