I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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