My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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