That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
