That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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