i need an iv and a liver transplant
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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