just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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