she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
