You work out of a Hotel?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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