After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
