oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
