No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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