as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize