Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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