dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I need a beard to bite.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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