I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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