But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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