The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
